Professional Courtesy

Sorry we haven’t been around for a while. Work commitments took over for both of us in an aggressive way, but things should be calming down later in the week. To hold the blob over, here’s a thing I recently read in the New York Times’s “Social Q’s” column by Philip Galanes:

Par-Fuming

The receptionist at my office wears a horrible perfume that permeates the office. How can I let her know that her perfume is putting a musky damper on my day?

Anonymous,
Los Angeles

It’s hard to pinpoint exactly where your liberties leave off and mine begin. I hate those Gordon Gekko shirts, for instance, with striped bodies and white collars. They’re so master-of-the-universe. But unfortunately, my preference does not trump your right to wear them: The assault on my senses is minor, and I’m free to turn away.

Perfumes are different. If the wearer uses too much, the scent becomes unavoidable, causing headaches and spontaneous gagging. So the question is: Do you merely dislike her perfume when you’re passing by her desk, or can you really smell it when you’re sitting at your work station or in communal areas?

If it’s the former, you’re going to have to put up with it. But if it’s the latter, you may speak with your supervisor — otherwise known as “the chicken’s way out” — or have an extremely polite word with the receptionist herself. Apologize for bringing up something so personal: “I’m sorry,” you might say, “but your perfume is somehow carrying all the way over to my desk, and it’s bothering me. Do you think you could wear less of it?”

Or you can always buy a gas mask. Now that the Department of Homeland Security has stopped handing out Code Oranges like peanuts, you may get a good buy on one from your local Army-Navy store.

Here’s a partial list of perfumes I think should be banned at all offices:

• Opium
• Paris
• Angel
• Poison
• Rush
• Fracas (which I like, on the right person in a non-office setting)
  

I know I’m forgetting a lot of the worst offenders. What are they?

(Image from Office-Politics.)